[Dazai definitely doesn't need lessons in tying people up, though he considers the possibility of taking some anyway, just so he can humiliate Chuuya in public. But that would probably just get them thrown out of class, and the fact that it's a class at all kind of makes Dazai not want to do it in the first place. Oh, well. He'll keep it in mind.
And there comes Chuuya's realization at last. Dazai doesn't even care if Chuuya meant his words the way Dazai chose to interpret them: what was said, was said. And Dazai is glad about it - a rare bit of actual happiness! - so good luck getting him to believe otherwise now.]
Should you really be calling me a bastard when I'm the only person who can make you feel that way?
[He's just going to lord that over Chuuya forever, with various degrees of semi-deliberate misinterpretation whenever he feels like it. You made a mistake, Chuuya...]
[Chuuya slaps a hand over Dazai's mouth before he can even finish the sentence.]
Shut up. [Maybe he should use his ability to sink into the couch and disappear through the floor.] You're the only person who can annoy me this much!
[The problem is that Dazai's interpretation isn't not true, even if it's not what Chuuya had meant. But he can't just admit something like that! He'd never live it down! He's already never living it down!]
I shouldn't let you do any of this. We're skipping past bondage.
[Except the next section isn't any better. Chuuya stares at the title - mental control - and doesn't even say anything else. This is the part that's going to be revealing.]
[Dazai makes a show of looking offended at being so rudely shut-up, but he doesn't actually object, nor does he even pretend to outside of a brief, pouty frown. He'll take that compliment - yes, being able to annoy Chuuya the most is clearly a compliment! - and keep it close to his non-existent heart.]
Very well.
[Skipping past bondage, it is. They've discussed what they needed to, anyway: there's already some new ideas to try. So it's fine.
The next section, though... Dazai looks somewhere between displeased and doubtful.]
... Chuuya is never going to be capable of this.
[Dazai isn't even saying that in an elaborate attempt at reverse psychology or anything like that. He just genuinely doesn't think that Chuuya has it in him to do things like follow orders. Sure, Dazai can push Chuuya a bit once he's had an orgasm or two, but beyond that? It's got to be impossible.]
[Chuuya isn't sure whether that displeased look is just because Dazai figures it's impossible, or because he's really not interested. There's no point in talking about it if Dazai isn't interested, and Chuuya isn't good at talking about these things to begin with. He rubs at the back of his neck, not really aware of it himself.]
You wouldn't want me to always just obey anyway.
[That's often the game between them, isn't it? Chuuya makes it difficult, and Dazai finds a way to get what he wants anyway, and then gets to be smug about it. Then again, they've never actually talked about it at all.
And it's really tempting to just get himself drunk for this conversation.]
But -- if we're gonna talk about this anyway. If we're doing this. I should have said this before we even started. Whatever. But I know there's a lot of things we can't really do if I'm not cooperating at least a little. And it's kind of unfair if you always have to win some bet or find a way to trick me just to set it all up. Not that you play fair either, but --
What I'm saying is that if there's something you wanna try, I don't have to fight you. There's no point in even looking at this list if I'm just gonna fight you. I already knew that when I printed this out.
[He says that, but his tone makes it sound like he's in the middle of a fight right now. But this time, it's only against himself, really - because he does mean what he's saying. He's willing to try.]
[Chuuya makes an excellent point for once, and Dazai doesn't try to argue. It is a strange little balance they have going on here... Dazai gets off on getting his way, but it's certainly true that it would be boring if Chuuya just did as he ordered. He supposes that makes this whole kink thing a lot more complicated than it's "normally" likely to be.
Dazai holds back a sigh. Truly, needing to define anything too much takes all the fun out of it, doesn't it? He's still willing to have this talk, though: he does understand the necessity.
... Wait... All this talk about Chuuya not fighting him... Does that mean Chuuya is giving him a free pass? ... Dazai shouldn't. He really shouldn't ask this, even jokingly, but...]
... Does that mean that you'll finally wear a maid costume if I ask?
[He doesn't even really care about maid costumes! It's just the principle of the thing!! Or whatever passes for a principle with Dazai.]
[Chuuya had managed to put himself a little on edge, admitting as much as he did. He's ready to defend himself, just in case, expecting... something.
Not a complete derailment. He's mentally sputtering for a moment.]
You --
[No, Chuuya did say he'd go along with Dazai's plan a little more easily. He'd meant it. He shouldn't immediately object, no matter how much he wants to. And of course Dazai would immediately try to test him on it, to see if he really means it, even though Chuuya didn't specifically say he'd go along with anything Dazai suggested, so that still technically leaves him a lot of wiggle room.
It's not like he has any serious objections to it, it's just that Dazai has been trying to get him to wear that damn costume since they were sixteen, and he really doesn't want to let him claim that victory now.]
If you ask? [He'll just throw Dazai's words right back at him.] I'll say no.
[Dazai smirks. That's a pretty nice reaction, after all.]
Then, if I order you to?
[He's only halfway serious, to be fair: he absolutely wants to get Chuuya into a maid costume at some point, but he's played the long game with some other things, and he can be patient here, too. He'd definitely want to save it for a special occasion, regardless.
Didn't you just say I'll never be capable of taking orders?
[It's his turn to use Dazai's words against him. Payback for catching him off guard with his maid outfit kink, and for that too damn smug expression of his. It's not a no, though - he might as well have agreed, unfortunately. But it had been inevitable anyway.
At least that's what he'll tell himself.]
Figures that's your kink after all. Or at least the thing below it. But I guess it's impossible.
[Nah, it's fine that Chuuya can't take orders from Dazai to figuratively save his life, really. He knows when to do it when his life literally depends on it, and that is enough. The rest, they seem to have sorted out over the years. But life's no fun if you can't push your luck every now and then, is it?]
We'll save it for a special occasion, then. [It's going to happen! At some point!! Before he dies!!!
What else do they have to get through... Ah.]
Lifestyle rules is not an option, I presume?
[That's not a complaint, really. They both lead complicated lives that can't deal with too many restrictions, especially Chuuya.]
[Not when it comes to getting his way. Dazai never gives up on getting his way. And maybe Chuuya shouldn't call him out on giving up on getting what he actually wants... or maybe he's projecting. But Dazai shouldn't give up on something before they've even started to talk about it at all.
He manages (mostly, debatably) to keep his voice dismissive as he says it, at least. A small shield in case Dazai turns it back on him. And he won't complain about moving on down the list.]
[Dazai technically wasn't giving up, since he doesn't care that much about the whole idea - just for the record!! But he'll drop that discussion in favor of taking advantage of the opening offered.
Well, if they're doing this, Dazai is at least going to be reasonable about it. He may be the most unreasonable man alive, but he's still not looking to get Chuuya killed, or even in trouble with Mori. (Dazai will poke that badger himself when he feels like it, it's fine.)]
Underwear or lack thereof?
[Starting simple, because Chuuya isn't averse to lingerie as it is.]
Maybe writing on your body? Under your clothes, of course.
["DAZAI WAS HERE LOL" across his ass~! ... Okay, not really that, but. Even Dazai putting his name somewhere innocent would be fun. Or making Chuuya write things himself, if it comes to that!]
Maybe not playing with yourself for a while, too.
[Chuuya is perfectly capable of that, Dazai is sure. But it's different when you're not allowed, and you're thinking about how you're not allowed, isn't it?]
[Chuuya isn't surprised that Dazai has so many ideas right off the bat, because ideas are what the bastard is good at. He's really not sure how to react, though. He stares at Dazai for a second, shifting a little on the couch, because he's thinking about the idea of not being allowed right now and it's getting to him. Not to mention the idea of being marked by Dazai, or letting him control even the hidden parts of Chuuya's appearance. It would be a constant reminder throughout the day that it's Dazai he belongs to.
That would have Dazai thinking about him, too, wouldn't it? If he knew Chuuya was walking around like that for him?]
So anything that's not visible?
[That covers a lot more than just underwear or body writing, but for once Chuuya doesn't mind giving Dazai more to work with. It might backfire. It will definitely backfire. But there's no way to avoid that if they're doing this - that's sort of the point.]
Surprised you didn't suggest controlling my orgasms completely. [When he can't have one, and when he will have one, because Dazai definitely likes making him come when he doesn't want to as well.] It's rules, right? So I'm not just agreeing to a one time thing?
[Control Chuuya's orgasms, that is. Technically he doesn't, sure, but in practice? He'd wager good money that Chuuya thinks about him when he's masturbating, too. (Clearly that is also control, in a way!)
But it's fine, it's fine, they don't have to get all nitpicky about definitions. They both know what they know.]
Maybe later, then. [Full orgasm control. It seems more entertaining for brief periods of time than for a rule that applies always and everywhere. That makes the whole thing seem too much like a job!]
But yes: anything that's not visible, and not practically restrictive in any meaningful way.
[That's a no to real physical restrictions - barring anything used for orgasm control, maybe - but a yes to bondage under clothing that's mostly aesthetic. That's not going to hamper Chuuya's workaholic self too much, surely?]
[He definitely kind of does, but Dazai having a point doesn't mean Chuuya has to acknowledge it. Even if it doesn't even matter by now, if he's outright giving Dazai that power over him anyway.
And he does know Dazai wouldn't want to control it all the time. It has less of an impact, then, which would make it less fun for him. For both of them, maybe. The last thing Chuuya wants is for Dazai to think of any of this as some sort of chore. It takes away from what it should be - even if he has no fucking clue what exactly that is, and would still prefer not to try to figure that out. It's just them.]
Yeah. When you feel like it.
[He really shouldn't give Dazai this kind of power, but they both know he already has.]
That gives you a lot to work with. I'm going to regret this.
[They do both know it, and yet that somehow, quite miraculously, doesn't make the whole idea boring to Dazai. It's funny how his definitely-not-but-actually-indeed-a-relationship with Chuuya has always been that way. Other exceptions over his entire, miserable lifespan can be counted on one hand, and they've certainly never lasted this long. But it's probably better to just take that as a fact, and not think too much on it.]
You absolutely are.
[Very cheerfully, which is honestly warranted. Dazai is going to have a great time just thinking of all his options, here!]
This calls for a celebration!
[They should probably get to the rest of that kink list, but ehhhh, Dazai has scored a big win; he'd just as soon skip the rest.]
[That cheerful tone should probably worry Chuuya. Instead he finds himself wanting to return the smile, ducking his head a little to hide his expression. He's weirdly pleased that Dazai is so pleased. Inevitable regret or not, Chuuya knows what he's getting himself into, which means he wanted to give him this.]
What kind of celebration?
[Chuuya still has things on that list he's curious about, for one reason or another. But the section about rules, about their dynamic outside of actual scenes, was definitely the most important one. They've somehow managed without ever outright talking about their kinks up until now, so it's probably fine. He won't insist if Dazai is ready to move on.
Besides, they can pick it up again another day, maybe.]
Not like you can really test out your new powers yet.
[Nah, not really. But he can lowkey threaten otherwise, just a little. He could send Chuuya out for something after some quick preparations, after all!
But that's not what he has in mind at the moment.]
I suppose I'd settle for a drink.
[There's no settling; that was his only "plan", really. But, look, he was cranky when he got here, and now he's in a lovely mood. A celebration is in order, surely?]
-- You probably could. [Better not to challenge Dazai.] But it won't have the same effect if we're just staying here.
[Of course he'll wear lingerie if Dazai tells him to, or let Dazai write on him... actually, that one might still end up getting to Chuuya, depending on what Dazai writes.
There's no point in worrying about that, though, not after he already agreed. He stands up, and goes to refill Dazai's glass for him, even though serving him was nowhere on the list of things they agreed on. But maybe he's feeling nice. Maybe it's an excuse so that when he sits down again, he can sit close enough that leaning into him seems almost accidental. He grabs his earlier wine glass off the table again, and takes a sip.]
[Just because they're here, that doesn't mean they have to stay here! But Chuuya needn't worry: Dazai isn't super dedicated to that idea. He's feeling surprisingly all right, and it's nice to be here together, somehow. How that works when they're not even doing anything is a mystery - but most mysteries, Dazai has come to find, are better left unsolved.
Accepting his glass, Dazai takes a sip, waiting for Chuuya to settle close by before putting his arm around him, leaning in for a soft whisper.]
This is why you should wear a maid costume.
[Such a good maid! Bit of a mouth on him, though.
Bit of an elbow too. So please don't break his ribs, he meant it as a compliment!!]
[But Dazai could send him out. With the mood Chuuya is in now, he'd most likely obey, even though he doesn't actually want to go anywhere. But it feels good to not always be fighting Dazai on everything, too. This thing between them feels right.
But that doesn't mean he'll go along with absolutely anything Dazai might come up with. And Chuuya nearly spits out his wine when Dazai mentions the maid outfit.]
I wasn't--
[Serving him like some maid, or anything like that!! He was just being nice!! He sets his wine glass down to protect it from getting spilled, since apparently drinking it is too risky for now.]
Even if I agree to everything else, that's the one thing I'll keep saying no to.
[That would be funny, but not exactly a source of arousal for Dazai. That's fine, though: as long as he keeps the stakes going higher and higher, eventually that maid outfit isn't going to seem so bad anymore.
This isn't the time and place to push things, though, and he raises his hands - glass and all - immediately after his question.]
It was rhetorical! Purely rhetorical...
We can talk about it more some other time.
[He's definitely going to keep bringing it up. But he'll drop it for now, it's fine!]
[Clearly Chuuya is Prince Charming to Dazai's Snow White! Not that he wants to be Prince Charming, either, since that doesn't go well at all with the Port Mafia image.
And he really doesn't trust Dazai when he says it's rhetorical. Maybe it it for now, but it might not stay that way, especially if that's what he's planning to use to convince Chuuya to wear a maid outfit instead. It might be easier, in the long run, to just wear the damn thing for him, get the inevitable over with, but even if he did Dazai would just come up with something else anyway. He never runs out of ideas to torture Chuuya... And if he did, that would honestly be worse.]
Let's talk about biting instead.
[That's on the list, too, and Chuuya is a fan! Also is it safe to reach for his wine glass again? He's gonna reach for his wine glass again.]
If I'm already a princess, why would I need the dress?
[That, or he's trying to reverse-psychology Chuuya into wearing a maid outfit anyway. But he's still playing the long game, there. He's in no rush.
That said, he would absolutely dress like a princess for maid!Chuuya to serve. Dazai knows no shame; he really doesn't care what he wears.
Biting, however...]
... Aren't you taking being my dog a little too seriously?
[For some reason, he's just going to assume that Chuuya is the one doing the biting, because clearly Dazai is the one obsessed about the dog thing. Regardless, it's not a hard no, really. Dazai just doesn't super see the appeal.
Wine away, though. They're having a good talk; it's fine.]
You don't need it, but you can't let anyone else wear it, either.
[Clearly that makes sense! Or something. Not that Chuuya wouldn't wear a dress, but a princess dress isn't exactly his style.
But Chuuya really isn't winning this argument, on any front. They're back to the dog thing, and he almost objects out of habit, and there's a slight but obvious pause as he tries to get himself back on track. They don't actually have to argue here, and he doesn't really want to, anyway. He's too comfortable leaning against Dazai's side. He wants all of this, and he doesn't have to pretend not to.]
How else is a dog supposed to punish a shitty owner?
[His tone is teasing. He only brought up biting as another distraction from various dresses, anyway, he knows it's not Dazai's thing.]
Can't I be one of those rebellious princesses who rejects gender norms?
[Ignoring how those often strengthen stereotypes more than anything... The point is: Dazai can totally give his dress away, symbolically!
But the more important point is: they're having a nice time, with each other, and with drinks. It's hard to think of anything that would make the moment better - and that's strange, really, but Dazai chooses not to question it.]
The owner is the one who does the punishing. Some dogs even enjoy that, as I recall.
[It's still not a "no" on the biting, really. But giving an outright "yes" feels a bit awkward, like something slipping out of Dazai's control. That's fine, really, but what if it doesn't work out, and he can't take it back? It's easier to be the one nominally in charge, even if it also means more effort, technically.]
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And there comes Chuuya's realization at last. Dazai doesn't even care if Chuuya meant his words the way Dazai chose to interpret them: what was said, was said. And Dazai is glad about it - a rare bit of actual happiness! - so good luck getting him to believe otherwise now.]
Should you really be calling me a bastard when I'm the only person who can make you feel that way?
[He's just going to lord that over Chuuya forever, with various degrees of semi-deliberate misinterpretation whenever he feels like it. You made a mistake, Chuuya...]
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Shut up. [Maybe he should use his ability to sink into the couch and disappear through the floor.] You're the only person who can annoy me this much!
[The problem is that Dazai's interpretation isn't not true, even if it's not what Chuuya had meant. But he can't just admit something like that! He'd never live it down! He's already never living it down!]
I shouldn't let you do any of this. We're skipping past bondage.
[Except the next section isn't any better. Chuuya stares at the title - mental control - and doesn't even say anything else. This is the part that's going to be revealing.]
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Very well.
[Skipping past bondage, it is. They've discussed what they needed to, anyway: there's already some new ideas to try. So it's fine.
The next section, though... Dazai looks somewhere between displeased and doubtful.]
... Chuuya is never going to be capable of this.
[Dazai isn't even saying that in an elaborate attempt at reverse psychology or anything like that. He just genuinely doesn't think that Chuuya has it in him to do things like follow orders. Sure, Dazai can push Chuuya a bit once he's had an orgasm or two, but beyond that? It's got to be impossible.]
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You wouldn't want me to always just obey anyway.
[That's often the game between them, isn't it? Chuuya makes it difficult, and Dazai finds a way to get what he wants anyway, and then gets to be smug about it. Then again, they've never actually talked about it at all.
And it's really tempting to just get himself drunk for this conversation.]
But -- if we're gonna talk about this anyway. If we're doing this. I should have said this before we even started. Whatever. But I know there's a lot of things we can't really do if I'm not cooperating at least a little. And it's kind of unfair if you always have to win some bet or find a way to trick me just to set it all up. Not that you play fair either, but --
What I'm saying is that if there's something you wanna try, I don't have to fight you. There's no point in even looking at this list if I'm just gonna fight you. I already knew that when I printed this out.
[He says that, but his tone makes it sound like he's in the middle of a fight right now. But this time, it's only against himself, really - because he does mean what he's saying. He's willing to try.]
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Dazai holds back a sigh. Truly, needing to define anything too much takes all the fun out of it, doesn't it? He's still willing to have this talk, though: he does understand the necessity.
... Wait... All this talk about Chuuya not fighting him... Does that mean Chuuya is giving him a free pass?
...
Dazai shouldn't. He really shouldn't ask this, even jokingly, but...]
... Does that mean that you'll finally wear a maid costume if I ask?
[He doesn't even really care about maid costumes! It's just the principle of the thing!! Or whatever passes for a principle with Dazai.]
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Not a complete derailment. He's mentally sputtering for a moment.]
You --
[No, Chuuya did say he'd go along with Dazai's plan a little more easily. He'd meant it. He shouldn't immediately object, no matter how much he wants to. And of course Dazai would immediately try to test him on it, to see if he really means it, even though Chuuya didn't specifically say he'd go along with anything Dazai suggested, so that still technically leaves him a lot of wiggle room.
It's not like he has any serious objections to it, it's just that Dazai has been trying to get him to wear that damn costume since they were sixteen, and he really doesn't want to let him claim that victory now.]
If you ask? [He'll just throw Dazai's words right back at him.] I'll say no.
[If he asks.]
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Then, if I order you to?
[He's only halfway serious, to be fair: he absolutely wants to get Chuuya into a maid costume at some point, but he's played the long game with some other things, and he can be patient here, too. He'd definitely want to save it for a special occasion, regardless.
Maybe Chuuya's birthday..? Food for thought!]
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[It's his turn to use Dazai's words against him. Payback for catching him off guard with his maid outfit kink, and for that too damn smug expression of his. It's not a no, though - he might as well have agreed, unfortunately. But it had been inevitable anyway.
At least that's what he'll tell himself.]
Figures that's your kink after all. Or at least the thing below it. But I guess it's impossible.
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[Nah, it's fine that Chuuya can't take orders from Dazai to figuratively save his life, really. He knows when to do it when his life literally depends on it, and that is enough. The rest, they seem to have sorted out over the years. But life's no fun if you can't push your luck every now and then, is it?]
We'll save it for a special occasion, then. [It's going to happen! At some point!! Before he dies!!!
What else do they have to get through... Ah.]
Lifestyle rules is not an option, I presume?
[That's not a complaint, really. They both lead complicated lives that can't deal with too many restrictions, especially Chuuya.]
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[Not when it comes to getting his way. Dazai never gives up on getting his way. And maybe Chuuya shouldn't call him out on giving up on getting what he actually wants... or maybe he's projecting. But Dazai shouldn't give up on something before they've even started to talk about it at all.
He manages (mostly, debatably) to keep his voice dismissive as he says it, at least. A small shield in case Dazai turns it back on him. And he won't complain about moving on down the list.]
What kind of rules?
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Well, if they're doing this, Dazai is at least going to be reasonable about it. He may be the most unreasonable man alive, but he's still not looking to get Chuuya killed, or even in trouble with Mori. (Dazai will poke that badger himself when he feels like it, it's fine.)]
Underwear or lack thereof?
[Starting simple, because Chuuya isn't averse to lingerie as it is.]
Maybe writing on your body? Under your clothes, of course.
["DAZAI WAS HERE LOL" across his ass~! ... Okay, not really that, but. Even Dazai putting his name somewhere innocent would be fun. Or making Chuuya write things himself, if it comes to that!]
Maybe not playing with yourself for a while, too.
[Chuuya is perfectly capable of that, Dazai is sure. But it's different when you're not allowed, and you're thinking about how you're not allowed, isn't it?]
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That would have Dazai thinking about him, too, wouldn't it? If he knew Chuuya was walking around like that for him?]
So anything that's not visible?
[That covers a lot more than just underwear or body writing, but for once Chuuya doesn't mind giving Dazai more to work with. It might backfire. It will definitely backfire. But there's no way to avoid that if they're doing this - that's sort of the point.]
Surprised you didn't suggest controlling my orgasms completely. [When he can't have one, and when he will have one, because Dazai definitely likes making him come when he doesn't want to as well.] It's rules, right? So I'm not just agreeing to a one time thing?
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[Control Chuuya's orgasms, that is. Technically he doesn't, sure, but in practice? He'd wager good money that Chuuya thinks about him when he's masturbating, too. (Clearly that is also control, in a way!)
But it's fine, it's fine, they don't have to get all nitpicky about definitions. They both know what they know.]
Maybe later, then. [Full orgasm control. It seems more entertaining for brief periods of time than for a rule that applies always and everywhere. That makes the whole thing seem too much like a job!]
But yes: anything that's not visible, and not practically restrictive in any meaningful way.
[That's a no to real physical restrictions - barring anything used for orgasm control, maybe - but a yes to bondage under clothing that's mostly aesthetic. That's not going to hamper Chuuya's workaholic self too much, surely?]
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[He definitely kind of does, but Dazai having a point doesn't mean Chuuya has to acknowledge it. Even if it doesn't even matter by now, if he's outright giving Dazai that power over him anyway.
And he does know Dazai wouldn't want to control it all the time. It has less of an impact, then, which would make it less fun for him. For both of them, maybe. The last thing Chuuya wants is for Dazai to think of any of this as some sort of chore. It takes away from what it should be - even if he has no fucking clue what exactly that is, and would still prefer not to try to figure that out. It's just them.]
Yeah. When you feel like it.
[He really shouldn't give Dazai this kind of power, but they both know he already has.]
That gives you a lot to work with. I'm going to regret this.
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You absolutely are.
[Very cheerfully, which is honestly warranted. Dazai is going to have a great time just thinking of all his options, here!]
This calls for a celebration!
[They should probably get to the rest of that kink list, but ehhhh, Dazai has scored a big win; he'd just as soon skip the rest.]
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What kind of celebration?
[Chuuya still has things on that list he's curious about, for one reason or another. But the section about rules, about their dynamic outside of actual scenes, was definitely the most important one. They've somehow managed without ever outright talking about their kinks up until now, so it's probably fine. He won't insist if Dazai is ready to move on.
Besides, they can pick it up again another day, maybe.]
Not like you can really test out your new powers yet.
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[Nah, not really. But he can lowkey threaten otherwise, just a little. He could send Chuuya out for something after some quick preparations, after all!
But that's not what he has in mind at the moment.]
I suppose I'd settle for a drink.
[There's no settling; that was his only "plan", really. But, look, he was cranky when he got here, and now he's in a lovely mood. A celebration is in order, surely?]
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[Of course he'll wear lingerie if Dazai tells him to, or let Dazai write on him... actually, that one might still end up getting to Chuuya, depending on what Dazai writes.
There's no point in worrying about that, though, not after he already agreed. He stands up, and goes to refill Dazai's glass for him, even though serving him was nowhere on the list of things they agreed on. But maybe he's feeling nice. Maybe it's an excuse so that when he sits down again, he can sit close enough that leaning into him seems almost accidental. He grabs his earlier wine glass off the table again, and takes a sip.]
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[Just because they're here, that doesn't mean they have to stay here! But Chuuya needn't worry: Dazai isn't super dedicated to that idea. He's feeling surprisingly all right, and it's nice to be here together, somehow. How that works when they're not even doing anything is a mystery - but most mysteries, Dazai has come to find, are better left unsolved.
Accepting his glass, Dazai takes a sip, waiting for Chuuya to settle close by before putting his arm around him, leaning in for a soft whisper.]
This is why you should wear a maid costume.
[Such a good maid! Bit of a mouth on him, though.
Bit of an elbow too. So please don't break his ribs, he meant it as a compliment!!]
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[But Dazai could send him out. With the mood Chuuya is in now, he'd most likely obey, even though he doesn't actually want to go anywhere. But it feels good to not always be fighting Dazai on everything, too. This thing between them feels right.
But that doesn't mean he'll go along with absolutely anything Dazai might come up with. And Chuuya nearly spits out his wine when Dazai mentions the maid outfit.]
I wasn't--
[Serving him like some maid, or anything like that!! He was just being nice!! He sets his wine glass down to protect it from getting spilled, since apparently drinking it is too risky for now.]
Even if I agree to everything else, that's the one thing I'll keep saying no to.
[Just because!!]
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[That would be funny, but not exactly a source of arousal for Dazai. That's fine, though: as long as he keeps the stakes going higher and higher, eventually that maid outfit isn't going to seem so bad anymore.
This isn't the time and place to push things, though, and he raises his hands - glass and all - immediately after his question.]
It was rhetorical! Purely rhetorical...
We can talk about it more some other time.
[He's definitely going to keep bringing it up. But he'll drop it for now, it's fine!]
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[Clearly Chuuya is Prince Charming to Dazai's Snow White! Not that he wants to be Prince Charming, either, since that doesn't go well at all with the Port Mafia image.
And he really doesn't trust Dazai when he says it's rhetorical. Maybe it it for now, but it might not stay that way, especially if that's what he's planning to use to convince Chuuya to wear a maid outfit instead. It might be easier, in the long run, to just wear the damn thing for him, get the inevitable over with, but even if he did Dazai would just come up with something else anyway. He never runs out of ideas to torture Chuuya... And if he did, that would honestly be worse.]
Let's talk about biting instead.
[That's on the list, too, and Chuuya is a fan! Also is it safe to reach for his wine glass again? He's gonna reach for his wine glass again.]
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[That, or he's trying to reverse-psychology Chuuya into wearing a maid outfit anyway. But he's still playing the long game, there. He's in no rush.
That said, he would absolutely dress like a princess for maid!Chuuya to serve. Dazai knows no shame; he really doesn't care what he wears.
Biting, however...]
... Aren't you taking being my dog a little too seriously?
[For some reason, he's just going to assume that Chuuya is the one doing the biting, because clearly Dazai is the one obsessed about the dog thing. Regardless, it's not a hard no, really. Dazai just doesn't super see the appeal.
Wine away, though. They're having a good talk; it's fine.]
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[Clearly that makes sense! Or something. Not that Chuuya wouldn't wear a dress, but a princess dress isn't exactly his style.
But Chuuya really isn't winning this argument, on any front. They're back to the dog thing, and he almost objects out of habit, and there's a slight but obvious pause as he tries to get himself back on track. They don't actually have to argue here, and he doesn't really want to, anyway. He's too comfortable leaning against Dazai's side. He wants all of this, and he doesn't have to pretend not to.]
How else is a dog supposed to punish a shitty owner?
[His tone is teasing. He only brought up biting as another distraction from various dresses, anyway, he knows it's not Dazai's thing.]
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[Ignoring how those often strengthen stereotypes more than anything... The point is: Dazai can totally give his dress away, symbolically!
But the more important point is: they're having a nice time, with each other, and with drinks. It's hard to think of anything that would make the moment better - and that's strange, really, but Dazai chooses not to question it.]
The owner is the one who does the punishing. Some dogs even enjoy that, as I recall.
[It's still not a "no" on the biting, really. But giving an outright "yes" feels a bit awkward, like something slipping out of Dazai's control. That's fine, really, but what if it doesn't work out, and he can't take it back? It's easier to be the one nominally in charge, even if it also means more effort, technically.]
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