[Chuuya won’t let go. He knows holding on is only pissing Dazai off more, but he can’t bring himself to. He refuses to think about that too deeply.]

If you orchestrated all of it, then you can’t be angry that I was stuck listening to the orders of that rat, either.

[Chuuya is pissed at himself. He’d needed to be there, at the prison, but he’d almost failed, he’d almost killed Dazai. He still remembers how much blood there had been, most of it because Chuuya shot him, some of it because he’d hat to let Dostoyevsky make the elevator fall.

Chuuya’s only goal, those moments where the vampire curse didn’t suppress everything he was, had been to get Dazai out of there alive.

Though losing his own humanity - what humanity he has - has always been his worst nightmare. Dying doesn’t scare him, but dying as a vampire does.]

I wasn’t his damn dog. I was fighting him every second.