[ part of him yearns for the privacy of one-on-one; in this frail equilibrium for the other two to turn on him is always a possibility of varying degrees. rather than turning him off completely, dostoevsky finds the challenge entertaining even if its nature is an unusual one, requiring physical intimacy rather than the edges of blades and barrels of guns. but there is something fyodor knows, and he suspects dazai must be aware of it too— he is playing half-heartedly, after all in this scenario chuuya would back up dazai if anything gets out of hand; in turn he is also almost certain dazai would protect chuuya if the roles were reversed. interesting enough, fyodor himself finds disappointment in this— as if he is falling short somewhere along the mark required to give in and give in entirely.
and having been subject to chuuya's knee to his stomach a few minutes ago, he's certain the angry red is blooming purple and tomorrow will look an angry bright purple mixed with green. fyodor hates being marked physically without some semblance of consent - being hit is not a thing that brings him pleasure, even if it had been part of something else and not a threat to his life.
chuuya's teeth on his thumb make his eyes flutter because yes, that does feel good. he takes the opportunity to swoop in closer towards chuuya, the same sort of kiss planted on the corner of his mouth that he had just bestowed upon dazai moments before. less affectionate, no underlying messages in the gesture. ]
How should we make our dearest darling Dazai bleed? [ then, taking advantage of the hand that has been on his wrist, fyodor switches. one hand remains loosely hooked on the edge of chuuya's pants, and the saliva-coated one grasps dazai's instead and brings his palm up to fyodor's mouth.
an open mouth kiss. the press of teeth. they'd spoken of this once, the biting, the feeding, the tearing of flesh— back then the acceptance of dazai to said game had felt like a ploy for distraction, an attempt to buy time and fyodor had felt despondent for a brief minute. he is a creature of war and violence, tenderness tends to be lost on him.
chuuya's hand on dazai's neck makes him shiver in anticipation, the promise of the grip tightening and the face dazai would make... ]
[Chuuya looks surprised at the gentle kiss. Surprised and confused, like he'd been ready for anything but that. Someone like him is always expecting violence. He would have wanted it to last longer.
But this is still their game. There's a lot that's not being said here, and Chuuya can catch the way they look at each other even if he doesn't understand every meaning. They're still having conversations without him. His earlier jealousy has faded though, because he's here now, and it's not like he has any intention of letting them forget that, of letting them underestimate him.]
Don't call him that.
[Ours, he means. The rat can call Dazai whatever disgusting pet name he likes, as long as he doesn't include Chuuya in it.]
I never wanted any claim to him.
[He's still looking at Dazai as he says it, tone disgusted. His grip tightens for a second, enough to be a threat, a reminder that Chuuya is more than strong enough to do it... And then his hand twists, and instead he rakes his nails downwards until they hit bandages, leaving a trail of red marks. There's no blood now, but all it would take is a little more strength.
His grin is back at the threat of violence, a show he likes to put on. Maybe he should take back his knife, instead of leaving it in the door, because he doubts they'd stop him. Chuuya is the one who decided he couldn't.]
Should I make both of you match? Isn't that what you want?
[Oh..? Fyodor seemingly bringing back the topic of cannibalism, if only in some small way, tickles Dazai's curiosity - not so much for the action itself, as for the unsatisfying way that conversation had ended. What, then, is different now? This feels a little bit like forgiveness granted to him by Fyodor, and while that is an absurd notion on several levels, Dazai finds it still pleases him... except for the fact that Chuuya is here. As inclined to violence as Chuuya is, Dazai isn't sure if including him in the darker games between Fyodor and him is a good idea.
But then, maybe that's mostly because he's not sure he should risk that much vulnerability in front of both these people... and arguably it's also because he knows that even Chuuya might not survive their games, if they went all out. (It's funny how Chuuya is so very predictable, but when it comes to Fyodor and Dazai's intricate chess games, Chuuya would definitely be a loose cannon. (But on their current level, it's probably fine..?))]
Nor did you ever have any, Chuuya.
[Just sayin'. Dazai doesn't especially want a claim on you, either, but the reverse? That's outright laughable.
Dazai doesn't respond at all when his throat is briefly constricted, confident that he can handle it, and determined to show exactly how worried he isn't about the outcome. When Chuuya scratches him, though, he hisses, though he tries to end the sound as more of a bored sigh. Pain-wise, it was hardly impressive, but it was unexpected, and a sharp kind of pain: a response was just inevitable.]
Don't be disgusting.
[About the matching, he means. That's gross. They match enough on the inside, and Dazai isn't sure he likes that, even though he also enjoys it.]
Maybe we should hoist you up, Chuuya. Wouldn't you like to be high up for a change?
[Ah... It seems like Dazai is actually a little annoyed about the scratching and/or the suggestion that he matches Fyodor somehow. Go figure.]
[ questions of owning and ownership, possessing and possession— he lies in bed at night and feels the hands of all of those crime and punishment has owned and dispatched— not nightmares, mere accompaniment during the intermissions between one set of plans and another. dazai's palm is pressed more insistently against his mouth, no threat of bites and blood. an answer and concession for dazai: not their kind of violence, no, not here where chuuya's presence could escalate things in ways neither one could predict nor control. ]
We have no desire to match. [ dostoevsky smiles against the palm before he lets both of them go, hands falling neatly by his side. ] That we do match in certain ways is out of our control, it simply is the nature of how God made us. Matching intellects. Making sure there was someone walking on this earth that could provide a challenge. [ this is as close to an explanation as he comes, for chuuya's benefit and perhaps to placate things before both of them end up hoisted up by chuuya's ability.
hanging upside down would render him unconscious and he will not permit that level of violence against his person.
still, that denial of claim... dostoevsky thinks, amused, that it is something wanted. still yearned for. dazai seeking to fill the hole, chuuya seeking connection. the hypothesis is not certain, belief and truth are not always in accordance but dostoevsky feels, rare as that is, a weathered warmth. like frostbitten fingers held over the fire, no sensation until it hits all at once. aching, trembling, vulnerable. ]
Don't you worry, Godling, darling Dazai and I are too different to ever fully match. You need not look so disgusted at the prospect. The same goes for you, Dazai.
[ he is not even offended about these things, however ownership... well matching is not a requirement for such attachments. the people dostoevsky has owned (and it goes one way and one way only) are vastly different, unmatching. ]
[Dazai's hiss is satisfying. Chuuya looks incredibly pleased with himself, just for a second, because knowing he can still force reactions out of Dazai might make the rest of this worth it, no matter how annoying these two get. And he's definitely annoyed at the current topic.]
You're like a cheap knock off version.
[The two of them, he means, and no, he won't specify who is the knock off version here. They both are.
And he doesn't even think they're that similar. They have a few annoying traits in common, but there's definitely more about them that's different than not. As much as he hates to think about it, he's known Dazai for years now, he knows him, as much as it's possible to, he's seen sides of Dazai that he doesn't usually show, which means it's going to take a lot more than just this to impress him. And the damn rat is... A different kind of problem, anyway.
Which is in no way a reason not to piss them off about it. Or at least piss off Dazai about it, since the rat doesn't seem to care.]
Obviously you've been comparing.
[He says it like: You've been having a dick measuring contest. And then he grins, dropping the subject, because he was only ever going to put up with that for so long.]
You couldn't get me up there, dimwit. And this rat -- [he jerks his head towards Dostoevsky.] -- can't help when he can barely carry his own body.
[Wow, excuse you, obviously Fyodor is the knock-off?! He might just be older (it really is impossible to say, with people like them), but since Chuuya has known Dazai longer, clearly Dazai can only be the original.
So he'll just smile at Fyodor, ever so slightly. Haha, his pet chuuhuahua (whom he does not actually own, of course) insulted you~!
It's a brief moment of petty (and largely exaggerated) self-satisfaction, before his smile blossoms into something more genuine - and if Dazai looks halfway like a love-struck girl right about now, that's because they have been having a dick measuring contest, except it was brains rather than dicks, and oh boy was that a thrill!! That Dazai won that particular battle (not expected to be the end of the war) is honestly secondary to the pure pleasure of being able to play on his own level.
... But winning was still damn satisfying, actually.]
For all your complaining about us, you're still the one who keeps seeking us out, Chuuya.
[Probably not a good thing, where Fyodor is involved. But the less said (or even thought) about that, the better. Dazai doesn't care about Chuuya, after all. If there's a hole he needs filling - purely theoretically! - Chuuya is still 25 centimeters short!
Dazai turns to Fyodor, emphatically, deliberately. The opportunity to mock Chuuya is his main goal, here, but if he happens to get some intel in the process, so much the better.]
Don't you find him far too needy, Fedya? You could stick anything into him and it wouldn't be enough.
[ oh that smile. fyodor responds with one of his own, a gesture of goodwill. he will concede this battle to you, dazai because ultimately the insult of being a knock-off or not does not cause a dent. it would offend him far more to think chuuya considers dazai and fyodor more different. it would —
bother him. in a way that is entirely too private to even consider here, in this moment, where a slight slip might give dazai a foothold onto that. no, ultimately he's still going to kill everyone in this room when given the chance.
but fishing, how cute of you dazai. ] Is he? [ he faces dazai, a glance in chuuya's direction, as his bony hand reaches for the redhead. ] Why don't you show me? Let's see what makes him squirm the most.
[ there are already two available things they could use here and fyodor knows dazai is equally inventive with the limited resources available. ] Unless you want to still leave, Chuuya?
[A little too defensive, maybe, but they can't blame him of being the one to have sought them out this time. Not that it's completely wrong, but that doesn't mean he's willing to admit it. He knows seeking out either of them is a bad idea.
And it seems like this time won't be any different. He tenses at Dazai's provocation, like he wants to react violently. He's immediately blushing.]
Like hell I'd run away.
[So the rat's chosen a side. And Dazai is annoyed from earlier. He probably should try to stop them, or at least not provoke them more than he already has, but that was never going to happen. He'll slide a hand around the back of either of their necks, and then take a sharp and sudden step back, pulling them with him, tugging them off balance and bringing them down to his level.
He'll lean in to bite at Dazai's lips, kissing him hard for a second. Then he'll repeat the same with Dostoevsky, letting it linger just a little longer, for no reason other than to annoy his ex-partner. Then he'll let go of them both. He'll go along with their plans.
But his expression is defiant: Try to impress him, then.]
[They are, indeed, in Chuuya's apartment, though in Dazai's case, he was "invited" there, rather than just showing up. It's a useful argument, but one that Dazai chooses not to make. Chuuya doesn't need reminding of his initial goal in coming here, and Fyodor doesn't need to feel any kind of special just for allowing himself in. Is it surprising that Fyodor knows Chuuya's apartment? Not really, all things considered. Does it still bother Dazai? Yes, actually. There are things he'll gladly do with Fyodor, and things he'll gladly share, but there are also lines that are not meant to be crossed. When it comes to the likes of Chuuya, things are bound to once again become a slippery slope with Fyodor.
Still, Dazai is here, and while it's annoying to have to be on his guard a bit - not for Fyodor or for Chuuya, but for the potentially volatile combination of them - the rewards for success should also be good. He's more than willing, then, to try to stuff Chuuya with some gym equipment (and, frankly, the more impossible, the more entertaining the attempt should be) - until Chuuya yanks the both of them back, and Dazai's mood goes from willing to childishly annoyed.
The benefit of being kissed first (though how rude, kissing Fyodor longer!) is that he has a moment or two to form a plan and prepare putting it into action. Perhaps he would have a hard time hoisting Chuuya up in revenge, but it's not impossible - and with a little help, it should even be extremely easy.
There was a reason he didn't cut the ropes that had held him up, after all. Surely they're still close enough to where they are, too.
Falling back as Chuuya lets him go, Dazai groans and rolls over in supposed pain, conveniently towards Chuuya - and slips the rope around Chuuya's ankle before getting to his feet, staggering off to grab hold of some gym machine or other for balance.]
You really... don't know how to treat guests, Chuuya.
[Dazai just needs a teensy distraction from Fyodor at that point, and then he can use the gym machine and/or some weights on it to suddenly pull the rope, and hoist Chuuya up in his stead.
Or they can do something different, really, but starting with this much feels like cosmic justice.]
[ this whole thing is childish but not unwelcome. games are played for entertainment, whether the aim is fucking someone or fucking someone up. the distinction has always been crystal clear but fyodor cannot find it in his heart to mind this entire scenario too much; it hadn't been the plan, and it had him bleeding but it is informative. rather than trying to break chuuya and dazai's grounded loyalty, he could find a wedge to slot himself there. it would take time. months. years - perhaps, but again, what else is there but time in this limbo the ada has him in?
he has a hamster in his room; a fridge filled with pudding; an expensive wine bottle in his pantry; his ushanka is stored away, deep in the closet. there is something transformative about this life he's pretending to lead that is becoming less of a pretence than he'd like.
and he knows dazai.
knows him deeply and intimately. they are alike, they are so close to being the same side of the coin but —
there is something rotted that reaches out, tenderly and wanting to be held. fyodor takes the kiss, and then while dazai does whatever dazai is going to do (which fyodor knows, he can tell) he provides a distraction by kissing chuuya. this is messy and open, inviting him in to take more, to bite to make him bleed if he so wishes. ]
[Chuuya knows he's being distracted. He knows what Dazai is up to. Do they really think it's that easy to make him forget who he's up against, and how much of an asshole his ex-partner is? As if Chuuya could ever forget: The second you can't see his hands, he's trying to pull something, and if you can see his hands somehow he still is.
He'll let the rat kiss him, though, and he'll nip at his lips as he kisses back, hard but not hard enough to cause damage yet, wrapping an arm loosely around his back, enjoying the moment, the weight of him. He'll also stick his leg out and up into the air, like an offering.]
At least tie me properly so it can hold me. You're too damn lazy.
[He barely bothers to break the kiss to say it. Dazai will be able to hear it even if it's spoken directly against the rat's lips.
The thing is, he knew what he signed up for when he decided to stay. There was a chance he could get the rat to side with him instead - that the rat would want Dazai to bleed - but if the two of them are turning on him, then what comes next is going to be inevitable. His only chance would have been to run. He wouldn't have been able to avoid it even if he did run.
So he's going to act like he doesn't care. He's not impressed. Whatever the two of them might want to do, he can take it, and if Dazai wants to get back at him for earlier, he can take it even better than Dazai did. Even knowing he won't be able to use his Ability for it.]
[How dare you ruin his brilliant plan, Chuu!? And after Fyodor so graciously supported him, too.
Dazai is lazy, and after being shut down so bluntly, he's less inclined to work for anything than before. Add to that the fact that Chuuya is (pretending to be) willing to go along with his plan, and Dazai loses all interest in doing anything of the sort.
What he is going to do, is pull at the leg Chuuya is still standing on. Chuuya had pulled them off balance, trying to make them both fall; he can have a taste of his own medicine.]
I'm not doing it anymore.
[Sitting and sulking like an overgrown child is clearly a much better plan. Considering what he came here to suffer, he's still ahead on a technicality; there are worse things than stopping now.]
I think I'll just blow up Chuuya's wine cellar, and go back home.
[ that is a good kiss. shame it is interrupted in such a way.
honestly, though dazai's moods and all are something fyodor considers familiar. on a good day, he'd even admit that he can deal with them just fine and enjoy the irrationality, the childishness, the games — he is not too dissimilar though he opts to act a certain way. more taciturn, a self-imposed exile from humanity and ability users.
with the addition of chuuya their usual game is off. fyodor feels it, like an uncomfortable sheen of sweat on his skin.
he moves, quicker than one would expect from fyodor and allows chuuya to fall with the pull from dazai. sorry, godling, he can't land on a heap on the floor while dazai is loose here. instead, fyodor tries to take advantage of the moment: chuuya falling, dazai pulling on that leg to openly attempt to tackle dazai onto the floor.
maybe chuuya's plan to make dazai bleed is the better option.
and they're all going to act like toddlers here apparently. ]
[For once, Chuuya doesn't even try to pull the rat down with him. He feels himself being yanked off balance and lets go, allows himself to fall onto his back, years of training allowing him to fall in a way that won't hurt.
He lands, throwing out an arm to break the fall and to provide leverage, and immediately his leg comes up in a kick aimed at Dazai.]
Like hell you're leaving!
[And seeing the rat tackle Dazai is satisfying. This is turning into a different kind of thrill, almost a free-for-all, except with alliances. It's funny. Or it's at least fun. It's unpredictable. Is the rat on his side now?
He doubts it, but maybe for the moment he is.]
I know you're not that much of a coward, Dazai.
[He's going to get up, and then join the pile, however it ends up.]
[Chuuya simply rolling through the fall is annoying, but expected: as frustrating as it is, Dazai knows he can't expect to achieve better from a split second's improvisation, just like he knows that he can dodge the predictable kick. Or he would be able to dodge it, if a certain rat bastard hadn't chosen that very moment to tackle him. Losing his balance, Dazai has no chance to even try to avoid being hit.
The kick hurts, but not enough to count as serious, especially from Chuuya; the fall is a bit rough-going, though, especially with a Fyodor-shaped anchor on Dazai's leg(s). While Dazai manages to catch himself to some degree, he's too late to avoid a collision with the floor completely: his mouth makes contact - not quite a full-on crash, but enough of an impact that his lips will swell and probably bleed some, if only on the inside.]
What... does cowardice have to do with it?
[He literally just boldly announced his plans to ruin your stupidly expensive wine collection! How does that make him a coward, or indeed anything but a man of exquisite taste?!?]
[ the violence spills out of him without a second thought; in a way, it is beyond his control, like a hound on the hunt that has caught the scent of blood. fortunately, his restricted use of crime and punishment means that it is not his ability that he uses but his own body. he thinks, distantly, abstractly that bodies are made for such things. bodies can inflict and resist such brutal punishments as if they helplessly refuse to atone for their crimes.
and his look is tender, fitting for a moment of intimacy between lovers and not what he does next: fyodor jabs his elbow against dazai's spine, hard and bruising— bitterness in such a blow, an accusation (this is what you've made of me, this is what you've reduced me to and i will make you bleed for it). then his mouth, stained with his own blood and chuuya's previously- mean, sharp teeth in the juncture between jaw and ear, a rebuke (shut up) but it is only blood he seeks, no flesh and he waits
expects
welcomes the punishment for his infliction of such violence.
( chuuya is not forgotten, of course, fyodor has him in the periphery of his awareness, knows where his next bruise might come from. is he on your side still, chuuya? — a bloody smile, he thinks blood looks better on the godling but blood is so familiar to dostoevsky. from womb to tomb, even muzzled and collared like this, he will never let anyone forget what he is. what he can do. and what he wants to do. ) ]
[Chuuya sees Dostoevsky move, sees Dazai flat against the floor, and for a painful second he's already regretting what he did to help put Dazai in that position. Worry floods through him, obvious in the way his body shifts, fingers gripping the floor, feet pulled under him as he's ready to launch himself forward to defend. He's not breathing for that long second.
This was supposed to be a game between the three of them, but the truth is he doesn't trust Dostoevsky at all, doesn't trust him not to cross that line and take this too far. And if that's the case, he should be the one to take the punishment, he'll make himself the target, not because Dazai doesn't deserve it, but because -- Just because. He doesn't want to think about it. He won't let Dazai get hurt because he let his guard down.
But the line isn't crossed, not yet. Instead of throwing himself forward, he rolls, ending up on his side facing Dazai, resting his head in one hand. He grins.
(He's still keeping an eye on the rat, but he'll side with him for now.)]
You're scared your plan won't work, so you drop it. That makes you a coward.
[Why Dazai really changed his mind about the plan isn't important. What's important is winning the argument, which has nothing to do with the truth.]
[This is why Dazai is not Mori: getting Fyodor on his side may have been a perfectly rational decision, and there have been some nice side effects to be sure, but right this moment, Dazai still wants to stab the guy and twist the knife.
He doesn't, though. Action invites reaction, but that is exactly why Dazai tries not to react and so cause more reactions - not unless he's sure that this won't end up being two against one, because he's really not sure he'd win that. He'd survive just fine (more's the pity...), but anything he does would only make things worse on him in both the short and long term.
Maybe, then, he'll simply let this happen for a bit, allow for that absurd Fyodor-Chuuya team-up only so that Chuuya will suffer the consequences and regret everything - because he will, sooner or later, and intensely. (Maybe that is a lesson Dazai wants to teach Chuuya anyway, after the guy's apparent dalliances with Fyodor. Not that he's jealous, or anything.)]
My plans never fail. [He looks at Chuuya, smirking in spite of the pain and his awkward position.] Never.
[So what do you think his plan is here, hmm? Whatever could it be~? You'll never know until you find out, at which point it will be too late.]
[ no reaction to his action; no consequence yet for the warm blood in his mouth, and fyodor plasters himself along dazai's back, like a hungry leech looking to feed on whatever poor sucker he's latched onto. he presses his mouth again on the wound, but it is soft. tentative, delicate licks and tugging on the skin, affectionate.
silence is what he opts for, this is a discussion between double black; whoever wins this argument is of no consequence to fyodor. not when he has dazai beneath him and his teeth and mouth and tongue against the soft skin.
(and deep, deeper still, this is not truly what fyodor wants. the blank card he carries on his back, the ache brought on by the humidity in the air, his skin stretched thin— part of him is present in the moment with dazai and chuuya, and the rest is back on his pedestal. too holy, too righteous, too much to be tolerated, too much to be put down with ease. he's not dazai, he does not yearn for death. he's not chuuya he does not yearn for normalcy or some such thing.) ]
[Chuuya notices the way Dostoevsky is paying attention to them. He notices what he's doing to Dazai's neck. Part of him doesn't like having this type of argument with Dazai in front of an audience, because it's always been personal between them, and he's never been a fan of anyone seeing him vulnerable. And Dazai is right, much as he hates it. If he had a plan, it hasn't failed yet.
Most of his attention is on Dazai. He's in this now, so he's pushing through.]
You can say that because you never tell anyone your plans until you know they'll work.
[Chuuya hates it, but he believes in Dazai's plans, no matter what he says, especially when Dazai is determined to make Chuuya suffer. He's not nervous about this situation, though. As if.
In fact, he should get to make Dazai bleed as well. He slides closer so that he can catch Dazai's lower lip between his teeth and bite hard. He wants to taste it, like tasting victory.]
[Chuuya is right about Dazai and his "plans", of course, but that doesn't mean Dazai will admit it. Besides, does it really count as the truth when he has at least a hundred plans at any given time? If the first one doesn't work, that doesn't mean the second or third that does work is any less Dazai's plan.
More importantly: it can't hurt to piss Chuuya off. Admittedly, it's a bit too easy at the best of times, but as long as both Chuuya and Fyodor keep moving, eventually all the pieces will align to give Dazai an opening. (Another important fact about plans: things always have to keep moving, because only if they don't can you be sure that nothing will change.) The fact that Fyodor is not engaging as much at the moment does not bode well in that respect, and the fact that his mouth feels rather nice on Dazai's neck doesn't change that.]
And what is your plan, then, Chuuya? If you have one, that is.
[Well, biting Dazai's lip is apparently a part of it, anyway. Dazai is starting to kind of hate all the pain in this encounter, but he just smirks (somewhat angrily) and licks his bloody lip.]
[ he leans over, a quick nip of teeth against the side of chuuya's mouth. yes, it does suit him, hanging unspoken. fyo shifts his weight, easing off dazai's back to give him room to move, though he still stays close and plastered to his side like a leech. one hand rests on the beige coat, fingers curling against dazai's hip.
in a very strange turn of events, fyodor finds that although he can see the branching alternatives of how this situation may develop, he doesn't care, and therefore planning for one or another is irrelevant. there are only reactions to be followed to their own logical conclusion. dazai's plans, chuuya's violence — it's odd that, for once, he feels rather disengaged from it. perhaps this is complacency at the current situation he's in.
whoever of the two lose the argument or whatever they have going on, fyodor wins. he's quite comfortable right now. ]
[Chuuya's attention does end up drawn to the rat as he pulls away, eyes tracking him for a moment. So that's how long their alliance lasted... He's on his own against Dazai now, just with an audience.
So he's going to lean in and help Dazai by licking away more blood, like he's satisfied with himself for what he did there. Which he is. And he's not worried, because even if Dazai has plans, Chuuya can handle it, like he always does. Even if Dazai is right in his implication that Chuuya doesn't have a single plan of his own here, and is just reacting to the two of them, trying to keep up.
He'll definitely figure out a way to keep up.]
I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours.
[He's just trying to buy himself enough time to come up with a plan to share. Actually, he's not even going to wait that long, because he prefers action over thinking, and he needs to keep this moving. Dazai abandoned the rope, so he's going to grab it from where it's still looped around his leg, and instead try to wrap it around Dazai's hands in one quick movement.]
[Dazai could fight off Chuuya, but that would only lead to more violence, and to Fyodor getting involved again. Admittedly, Fyodor taking some distance doesn't bode well, but getting him actively involved again wouldn't be much better in the short term. And so Dazai puts up with it for now, plotting his revenge for the more distant future. (Maybe he didn't steal those condoms, but helium-filled condom balloons all over Chuuya's wine cellar will be a thing!!)]
Are you sure it's me you want to tie up, Chuuya?
[... It's a little late to be asking that, but anyway, Dazai's goal is not to change Chuuya's mind (he knows better than to pick such a fight) so much as it is spreading Chuuya's attention. It's at least 90% a practical move, but he'd be lying if there wasn't some small portion of actual concern (and, of course, petty jealousy) involved, too.]
Your esteemed guest over there can't have come all the way here just to sit on the sidelines.
[Looking pointedly at Fyodor, because Dazai knows now and he doesn't trust you with his chuuhuahua one bit, Fyo!!]
You were tied up before I got here, dearest, darling Dazai. It is only right to continue and finish what you both started. [ but he is moderately offended at the implication he wouldn't be careful with the chuuhuahua (a fair assumption, fyo knows but he will be irritated nonetheless - not majorly, of course). he peels himself off dazai's back and sits, legs crossed as he continues observing.
fyo's posture is relaxed, elbow on his knee and chin propped on the back of his head as he surveys the scene. there is no participation, perhaps his own way to soothe the green pettiness he sensed - mild as it is, nothing of the sort should ever be fed here.
this may be his own concession too, a pointless acknowledgement of what he knows chuuya and dazai are, together and to each other. what fyo sees on display, and were he a modest man he'd have the inclination to look away.
and even further than that, the lack of plans (or rather, his decision for inaction in this encounter is an even more dangerous thing: trust, like a thin, silk filament of it stretched out between. fyo is trusting them enough to not follow his nature and instinct as although this is side by side by his own desire and curiosity towards double black and their dynamics now, it shouldn't be discounted as unimportant.) ]
I got to taste blood and a kiss, as all esteemed guests should. I'm satisfied.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
and having been subject to chuuya's knee to his stomach a few minutes ago, he's certain the angry red is blooming purple and tomorrow will look an angry bright purple mixed with green. fyodor hates being marked physically without some semblance of consent - being hit is not a thing that brings him pleasure, even if it had been part of something else and not a threat to his life.
chuuya's teeth on his thumb make his eyes flutter because yes, that does feel good. he takes the opportunity to swoop in closer towards chuuya, the same sort of kiss planted on the corner of his mouth that he had just bestowed upon dazai moments before. less affectionate, no underlying messages in the gesture. ]
How should we make our dearest darling Dazai bleed? [ then, taking advantage of the hand that has been on his wrist, fyodor switches. one hand remains loosely hooked on the edge of chuuya's pants, and the saliva-coated one grasps dazai's instead and brings his palm up to fyodor's mouth.
an open mouth kiss. the press of teeth. they'd spoken of this once, the biting, the feeding, the tearing of flesh— back then the acceptance of dazai to said game had felt like a ploy for distraction, an attempt to buy time and fyodor had felt despondent for a brief minute. he is a creature of war and violence, tenderness tends to be lost on him.
chuuya's hand on dazai's neck makes him shiver in anticipation, the promise of the grip tightening and the face dazai would make... ]
no subject
But this is still their game. There's a lot that's not being said here, and Chuuya can catch the way they look at each other even if he doesn't understand every meaning. They're still having conversations without him. His earlier jealousy has faded though, because he's here now, and it's not like he has any intention of letting them forget that, of letting them underestimate him.]
Don't call him that.
[Ours, he means. The rat can call Dazai whatever disgusting pet name he likes, as long as he doesn't include Chuuya in it.]
I never wanted any claim to him.
[He's still looking at Dazai as he says it, tone disgusted. His grip tightens for a second, enough to be a threat, a reminder that Chuuya is more than strong enough to do it... And then his hand twists, and instead he rakes his nails downwards until they hit bandages, leaving a trail of red marks. There's no blood now, but all it would take is a little more strength.
His grin is back at the threat of violence, a show he likes to put on. Maybe he should take back his knife, instead of leaving it in the door, because he doubts they'd stop him. Chuuya is the one who decided he couldn't.]
Should I make both of you match? Isn't that what you want?
no subject
But then, maybe that's mostly because he's not sure he should risk that much vulnerability in front of both these people... and arguably it's also because he knows that even Chuuya might not survive their games, if they went all out. (It's funny how Chuuya is so very predictable, but when it comes to Fyodor and Dazai's intricate chess games, Chuuya would definitely be a loose cannon. (But on their current level, it's probably fine..?))]
Nor did you ever have any, Chuuya.
[Just sayin'. Dazai doesn't especially want a claim on you, either, but the reverse? That's outright laughable.
Dazai doesn't respond at all when his throat is briefly constricted, confident that he can handle it, and determined to show exactly how worried he isn't about the outcome. When Chuuya scratches him, though, he hisses, though he tries to end the sound as more of a bored sigh. Pain-wise, it was hardly impressive, but it was unexpected, and a sharp kind of pain: a response was just inevitable.]
Don't be disgusting.
[About the matching, he means. That's gross. They match enough on the inside, and Dazai isn't sure he likes that, even though he also enjoys it.]
Maybe we should hoist you up, Chuuya. Wouldn't you like to be high up for a change?
[Ah... It seems like Dazai is actually a little annoyed about the scratching and/or the suggestion that he matches Fyodor somehow. Go figure.]
no subject
We have no desire to match. [ dostoevsky smiles against the palm before he lets both of them go, hands falling neatly by his side. ] That we do match in certain ways is out of our control, it simply is the nature of how God made us. Matching intellects. Making sure there was someone walking on this earth that could provide a challenge. [ this is as close to an explanation as he comes, for chuuya's benefit and perhaps to placate things before both of them end up hoisted up by chuuya's ability.
hanging upside down would render him unconscious and he will not permit that level of violence against his person.
still, that denial of claim... dostoevsky thinks, amused, that it is something wanted. still yearned for. dazai seeking to fill the hole, chuuya seeking connection. the hypothesis is not certain, belief and truth are not always in accordance but dostoevsky feels, rare as that is, a weathered warmth. like frostbitten fingers held over the fire, no sensation until it hits all at once. aching, trembling, vulnerable. ]
Don't you worry, Godling, darling Dazai and I are too different to ever fully match. You need not look so disgusted at the prospect. The same goes for you, Dazai.
[ he is not even offended about these things, however ownership... well matching is not a requirement for such attachments. the people dostoevsky has owned (and it goes one way and one way only) are vastly different, unmatching. ]
no subject
You're like a cheap knock off version.
[The two of them, he means, and no, he won't specify who is the knock off version here. They both are.
And he doesn't even think they're that similar. They have a few annoying traits in common, but there's definitely more about them that's different than not. As much as he hates to think about it, he's known Dazai for years now, he knows him, as much as it's possible to, he's seen sides of Dazai that he doesn't usually show, which means it's going to take a lot more than just this to impress him. And the damn rat is... A different kind of problem, anyway.
Which is in no way a reason not to piss them off about it. Or at least piss off Dazai about it, since the rat doesn't seem to care.]
Obviously you've been comparing.
[He says it like: You've been having a dick measuring contest. And then he grins, dropping the subject, because he was only ever going to put up with that for so long.]
You couldn't get me up there, dimwit. And this rat -- [he jerks his head towards Dostoevsky.] -- can't help when he can barely carry his own body.
no subject
So he'll just smile at Fyodor, ever so slightly. Haha, his pet chuuhuahua (whom he does not actually own, of course) insulted you~!
It's a brief moment of petty (and largely exaggerated) self-satisfaction, before his smile blossoms into something more genuine - and if Dazai looks halfway like a love-struck girl right about now, that's because they have been having a dick measuring contest, except it was brains rather than dicks, and oh boy was that a thrill!! That Dazai won that particular battle (not expected to be the end of the war) is honestly secondary to the pure pleasure of being able to play on his own level.
... But winning was still damn satisfying, actually.]
For all your complaining about us, you're still the one who keeps seeking us out, Chuuya.
[Probably not a good thing, where Fyodor is involved. But the less said (or even thought) about that, the better. Dazai doesn't care about Chuuya, after all. If there's a hole he needs filling - purely theoretically! - Chuuya is still 25 centimeters short!
Dazai turns to Fyodor, emphatically, deliberately. The opportunity to mock Chuuya is his main goal, here, but if he happens to get some intel in the process, so much the better.]
Don't you find him far too needy, Fedya? You could stick anything into him and it wouldn't be enough.
no subject
bother him. in a way that is entirely too private to even consider here, in this moment, where a slight slip might give dazai a foothold onto that. no, ultimately he's still going to kill everyone in this room when given the chance.
but fishing, how cute of you dazai. ] Is he? [ he faces dazai, a glance in chuuya's direction, as his bony hand reaches for the redhead. ] Why don't you show me? Let's see what makes him squirm the most.
[ there are already two available things they could use here and fyodor knows dazai is equally inventive with the limited resources available. ] Unless you want to still leave, Chuuya?
no subject
[A little too defensive, maybe, but they can't blame him of being the one to have sought them out this time. Not that it's completely wrong, but that doesn't mean he's willing to admit it. He knows seeking out either of them is a bad idea.
And it seems like this time won't be any different. He tenses at Dazai's provocation, like he wants to react violently. He's immediately blushing.]
Like hell I'd run away.
[So the rat's chosen a side. And Dazai is annoyed from earlier. He probably should try to stop them, or at least not provoke them more than he already has, but that was never going to happen. He'll slide a hand around the back of either of their necks, and then take a sharp and sudden step back, pulling them with him, tugging them off balance and bringing them down to his level.
He'll lean in to bite at Dazai's lips, kissing him hard for a second. Then he'll repeat the same with Dostoevsky, letting it linger just a little longer, for no reason other than to annoy his ex-partner. Then he'll let go of them both. He'll go along with their plans.
But his expression is defiant: Try to impress him, then.]
no subject
once againbecome a slippery slope with Fyodor.Still, Dazai is here, and while it's annoying to have to be on his guard a bit - not for Fyodor or for Chuuya, but for the potentially volatile combination of them - the rewards for success should also be good. He's more than willing, then, to try to stuff Chuuya with some gym equipment (and, frankly, the more impossible, the more entertaining the attempt should be) - until Chuuya yanks the both of them back, and Dazai's mood goes from willing to childishly annoyed.
The benefit of being kissed first (though how rude, kissing Fyodor longer!) is that he has a moment or two to form a plan and prepare putting it into action. Perhaps he would have a hard time hoisting Chuuya up in revenge, but it's not impossible - and with a little help, it should even be extremely easy.
There was a reason he didn't cut the ropes that had held him up, after all. Surely they're still close enough to where they are, too.
Falling back as Chuuya lets him go, Dazai groans and rolls over in supposed pain, conveniently towards Chuuya - and slips the rope around Chuuya's ankle before getting to his feet, staggering off to grab hold of some gym machine or other for balance.]
You really... don't know how to treat guests, Chuuya.
[Dazai just needs a teensy distraction from Fyodor at that point, and then he can use the gym machine and/or some weights on it to suddenly pull the rope, and hoist Chuuya up in his stead.
Or they can do something different, really, but starting with this much feels like cosmic justice.]
no subject
he has a hamster in his room; a fridge filled with pudding; an expensive wine bottle in his pantry; his ushanka is stored away, deep in the closet. there is something transformative about this life he's pretending to lead that is becoming less of a pretence than he'd like.
and he knows dazai.
knows him deeply and intimately. they are alike, they are so close to being the same side of the coin but —
there is something rotted that reaches out, tenderly and wanting to be held. fyodor takes the kiss, and then while dazai does whatever dazai is going to do (which fyodor knows, he can tell) he provides a distraction by kissing chuuya. this is messy and open, inviting him in to take more, to bite to make him bleed if he so wishes. ]
no subject
He'll let the rat kiss him, though, and he'll nip at his lips as he kisses back, hard but not hard enough to cause damage yet, wrapping an arm loosely around his back, enjoying the moment, the weight of him. He'll also stick his leg out and up into the air, like an offering.]
At least tie me properly so it can hold me. You're too damn lazy.
[He barely bothers to break the kiss to say it. Dazai will be able to hear it even if it's spoken directly against the rat's lips.
The thing is, he knew what he signed up for when he decided to stay. There was a chance he could get the rat to side with him instead - that the rat would want Dazai to bleed - but if the two of them are turning on him, then what comes next is going to be inevitable. His only chance would have been to run. He wouldn't have been able to avoid it even if he did run.
So he's going to act like he doesn't care. He's not impressed. Whatever the two of them might want to do, he can take it, and if Dazai wants to get back at him for earlier, he can take it even better than Dazai did. Even knowing he won't be able to use his Ability for it.]
no subject
Dazai is lazy, and after being shut down so bluntly, he's less inclined to work for anything than before. Add to that the fact that Chuuya is (pretending to be) willing to go along with his plan, and Dazai loses all interest in doing anything of the sort.
What he is going to do, is pull at the leg Chuuya is still standing on. Chuuya had pulled them off balance, trying to make them both fall; he can have a taste of his own medicine.]
I'm not doing it anymore.
[Sitting and sulking like an overgrown child is clearly a much better plan. Considering what he came here to suffer, he's still ahead on a technicality; there are worse things than stopping now.]
I think I'll just blow up Chuuya's wine cellar, and go back home.
no subject
honestly, though dazai's moods and all are something fyodor considers familiar. on a good day, he'd even admit that he can deal with them just fine and enjoy the irrationality, the childishness, the games — he is not too dissimilar though he opts to act a certain way. more taciturn, a self-imposed exile from humanity and ability users.
with the addition of chuuya their usual game is off. fyodor feels it, like an uncomfortable sheen of sweat on his skin.
he moves, quicker than one would expect from fyodor and allows chuuya to fall with the pull from dazai. sorry, godling, he can't land on a heap on the floor while dazai is loose here. instead, fyodor tries to take advantage of the moment: chuuya falling, dazai pulling on that leg to openly attempt to tackle dazai onto the floor.
maybe chuuya's plan to make dazai bleed is the better option.
and they're all going to act like toddlers here apparently. ]
no subject
He lands, throwing out an arm to break the fall and to provide leverage, and immediately his leg comes up in a kick aimed at Dazai.]
Like hell you're leaving!
[And seeing the rat tackle Dazai is satisfying. This is turning into a different kind of thrill, almost a free-for-all, except with alliances. It's funny. Or it's at least fun. It's unpredictable. Is the rat on his side now?
He doubts it, but maybe for the moment he is.]
I know you're not that much of a coward, Dazai.
[He's going to get up, and then join the pile, however it ends up.]
no subject
The kick hurts, but not enough to count as serious, especially from Chuuya; the fall is a bit rough-going, though, especially with a Fyodor-shaped anchor on Dazai's leg(s). While Dazai manages to catch himself to some degree, he's too late to avoid a collision with the floor completely: his mouth makes contact - not quite a full-on crash, but enough of an impact that his lips will swell and probably bleed some, if only on the inside.]
What... does cowardice have to do with it?
[He literally just boldly announced his plans to ruin your stupidly expensive wine collection! How does that make him a coward, or indeed anything but a man of exquisite taste?!?]
no subject
and his look is tender, fitting for a moment of intimacy between lovers and not what he does next: fyodor jabs his elbow against dazai's spine, hard and bruising— bitterness in such a blow, an accusation (this is what you've made of me, this is what you've reduced me to and i will make you bleed for it). then his mouth, stained with his own blood and chuuya's previously- mean, sharp teeth in the juncture between jaw and ear, a rebuke (shut up) but it is only blood he seeks, no flesh and he waits
expects
welcomes the punishment for his infliction of such violence.
( chuuya is not forgotten, of course, fyodor has him in the periphery of his awareness, knows where his next bruise might come from. is he on your side still, chuuya? — a bloody smile, he thinks blood looks better on the godling but blood is so familiar to dostoevsky. from womb to tomb, even muzzled and collared like this, he will never let anyone forget what he is. what he can do. and what he wants to do. ) ]
no subject
This was supposed to be a game between the three of them, but the truth is he doesn't trust Dostoevsky at all, doesn't trust him not to cross that line and take this too far. And if that's the case, he should be the one to take the punishment, he'll make himself the target, not because Dazai doesn't deserve it, but because -- Just because. He doesn't want to think about it. He won't let Dazai get hurt because he let his guard down.
But the line isn't crossed, not yet. Instead of throwing himself forward, he rolls, ending up on his side facing Dazai, resting his head in one hand. He grins.
(He's still keeping an eye on the rat, but he'll side with him for now.)]
You're scared your plan won't work, so you drop it. That makes you a coward.
[Why Dazai really changed his mind about the plan isn't important. What's important is winning the argument, which has nothing to do with the truth.]
no subject
He doesn't, though. Action invites reaction, but that is exactly why Dazai tries not to react and so cause more reactions - not unless he's sure that this won't end up being two against one, because he's really not sure he'd win that. He'd survive just fine (more's the pity...), but anything he does would only make things worse on him in both the short and long term.
Maybe, then, he'll simply let this happen for a bit, allow for that absurd Fyodor-Chuuya team-up only so that Chuuya will suffer the consequences and regret everything - because he will, sooner or later, and intensely. (Maybe that is a lesson Dazai wants to teach Chuuya anyway, after the guy's apparent dalliances with Fyodor. Not that he's jealous, or anything.)]
My plans never fail. [He looks at Chuuya, smirking in spite of the pain and his awkward position.] Never.
[So what do you think his plan is here, hmm? Whatever could it be~? You'll never know until you find out, at which point it will be too late.]
no subject
silence is what he opts for, this is a discussion between double black; whoever wins this argument is of no consequence to fyodor. not when he has dazai beneath him and his teeth and mouth and tongue against the soft skin.
(and deep, deeper still, this is not truly what fyodor wants. the blank card he carries on his back, the ache brought on by the humidity in the air, his skin stretched thin— part of him is present in the moment with dazai and chuuya, and the rest is back on his pedestal. too holy, too righteous, too much to be tolerated, too much to be put down with ease. he's not dazai, he does not yearn for death. he's not chuuya he does not yearn for normalcy or some such thing.) ]
no subject
Most of his attention is on Dazai. He's in this now, so he's pushing through.]
You can say that because you never tell anyone your plans until you know they'll work.
[Chuuya hates it, but he believes in Dazai's plans, no matter what he says, especially when Dazai is determined to make Chuuya suffer. He's not nervous about this situation, though. As if.
In fact, he should get to make Dazai bleed as well. He slides closer so that he can catch Dazai's lower lip between his teeth and bite hard. He wants to taste it, like tasting victory.]
What do you think, rat? Blood suits him.
no subject
More importantly: it can't hurt to piss Chuuya off. Admittedly, it's a bit too easy at the best of times, but as long as both Chuuya and Fyodor keep moving, eventually all the pieces will align to give Dazai an opening. (Another important fact about plans: things always have to keep moving, because only if they don't can you be sure that nothing will change.) The fact that Fyodor is not engaging as much at the moment does not bode well in that respect, and the fact that his mouth feels rather nice on Dazai's neck doesn't change that.]
And what is your plan, then, Chuuya? If you have one, that is.
[Well, biting Dazai's lip is apparently a part of it, anyway. Dazai is starting to kind of hate all the pain in this encounter, but he just smirks (somewhat angrily) and licks his bloody lip.]
no subject
in a very strange turn of events, fyodor finds that although he can see the branching alternatives of how this situation may develop, he doesn't care, and therefore planning for one or another is irrelevant. there are only reactions to be followed to their own logical conclusion. dazai's plans, chuuya's violence — it's odd that, for once, he feels rather disengaged from it. perhaps this is complacency at the current situation he's in.
whoever of the two lose the argument or whatever they have going on, fyodor wins. he's quite comfortable right now. ]
no subject
So he's going to lean in and help Dazai by licking away more blood, like he's satisfied with himself for what he did there. Which he is. And he's not worried, because even if Dazai has plans, Chuuya can handle it, like he always does. Even if Dazai is right in his implication that Chuuya doesn't have a single plan of his own here, and is just reacting to the two of them, trying to keep up.
He'll definitely figure out a way to keep up.]
I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours.
[He's just trying to buy himself enough time to come up with a plan to share. Actually, he's not even going to wait that long, because he prefers action over thinking, and he needs to keep this moving. Dazai abandoned the rope, so he's going to grab it from where it's still looped around his leg, and instead try to wrap it around Dazai's hands in one quick movement.]
Or I can show you.
no subject
Are you sure it's me you want to tie up, Chuuya?
[... It's a little late to be asking that, but anyway, Dazai's goal is not to change Chuuya's mind (he knows better than to pick such a fight) so much as it is spreading Chuuya's attention. It's at least 90% a practical move, but he'd be lying if there wasn't some small portion of actual concern (and, of course, petty jealousy) involved, too.]
Your esteemed guest over there can't have come all the way here just to sit on the sidelines.
[Looking pointedly at Fyodor, because Dazai knows now and he doesn't trust you with his chuuhuahua one bit, Fyo!!]
phone tag apologies in advance!
fyo's posture is relaxed, elbow on his knee and chin propped on the back of his head as he surveys the scene. there is no participation, perhaps his own way to soothe the green pettiness he sensed - mild as it is, nothing of the sort should ever be fed here.
this may be his own concession too, a pointless acknowledgement of what he knows chuuya and dazai are, together and to each other. what fyo sees on display, and were he a modest man he'd have the inclination to look away.
and even further than that, the lack of plans (or rather, his decision for inaction in this encounter is an even more dangerous thing: trust, like a thin, silk filament of it stretched out between. fyo is trusting them enough to not follow his nature and instinct as although this is side by side by his own desire and curiosity towards double black and their dynamics now, it shouldn't be discounted as unimportant.) ]
I got to taste blood and a kiss, as all esteemed guests should. I'm satisfied.
[ for now ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
feel free to assume Dazai is coming whenever is convenient tbh
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
cw for sacrilege tbh... i don't even really mean it but i hardcore had to do it
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)